Ibiza is closing
World Wide · 16.08.2007
By Илья Розов
As we know, a thing becomes far more valuable once you've lost it. The last party of the season is the same kind of thing, only not yet lost, but already on the verge of loss; just a little more — and it will all be over, and there's no telling what the future holds. That's why, to get the fullest impression of any party series, it's worth coming to its closing — there you can see everything that happened over the whole season, and even more. The season closings on Ibiza are a whole adventure, or, if you like, a ritual. But that doesn't mean a newcomer won't grasp the full pleasure of it — once you've made it to Ibiza, you're already done for. You'll come back a different person.
Here and below — commentary by DJ Oleg Air
"As everywhere in Spain, all of life on Ibiza is one continuous siesta smoothly flowing into a fiesta. It's a place where, amid the whole multitude of offerings, everyone can find something to their taste (or their pocket) — and in a single day a club can gather stars of a calibre that neither Russian nor even the top European promoters have ever dreamed of. As Yura Miloslavsky rightly put it, you can have a blast there on 100 euros a day, or 10,000 might not be enough. It's a place where every club is packed, and where everyone dances and knows the artists not just because they're fashionable. Where everyone takes pleasure in life, is open to talking and meeting people regardless of sex, age, wallet or nationality, and at the same time no one gets in anyone's way of relaxing just as freely."
With the clubs and bars on Ibiza it's the same situation as with the casinos in Las Vegas — each one finer than the last, and every one tries to outdo its competitors. Some try to create an "elite" atmosphere by raising the ticket price, others, on the contrary, make entry free but raise the price of drinks at the bar. And everywhere, everywhere, world-class stars are playing, from whom there's literally nowhere to hide.
"On the whole, despite the supposed sophistication of the crowd, most people come to Ibiza not for specific parties, artists, DJs or clubs. I chatted with Max Graham after his set at the club Eden, and I completely agree with him that literally only a few people in the club were listening attentively. The rest had just come to get wasted. Ibiza is fashionable, which is why more and more European youth flock there every year. On the other hand, the level of erudition in dance music is several orders of magnitude higher than in Russia, where only artists in radio rotation can draw a capricious crowd. Again, on Ibiza all the radio stations broadcast very high-quality music, at times fairly commercial or, on the contrary, underground. Cafés, restaurants, little shops, boutiques, passing cars, beaches — everything gives off dance rhythms pleasing to the ear. No pop schlock, no chanson or other such filth.".
4 September. Gatecrasher Closing Party.
The workshop of mass English rave is going through hard times right now — all these newfangled styles are breaking the back of progressive house, which is as plain as a shoe sole. But Gatecrasher is an unsinkable frigate, and when all these dubsteps remain only in the fading memory of old-timers, a new generation will worship the Gatecrasher badge in a frenzy. For now, though, a modest closing ceremony, under the patronage of Radio 1 Dance Anthems host Dave Pearce and friends.
10 September, Dusted Closing Party
All season the Dusted promo crew put the slogan "House music all night long" into practice, and they didn't cheat — it really was house, and really all night. There were 7 such nights in all, and on each one of the legends played, for example Graeme Park or the joker Boy George. Headlining the closing will be a man named Josef Zacher, or simply Yousef. He'll be helped by the well-known abusers of taste and style who have flooded the radio airwaves, Hoxton Whores, and several other DJs, among whom Sonny Wharton is of interest — five years ago he dropped everything in his native Wales and cleared off to live on Ibiza. Now that's a move!
16 September, Judgement Sunday Closing Party
Judge Jules's signature series is a benchmark of quality in house music, though at times you can only marvel at the breadth of its patron's musical interests. At the closing, for instance, there'll be, among other things, hard house from the fragile but tough girls Lisa Lashes and Anne Savage, breaks performed by Crafty Cuts, and new-rave from Shitdisco. A motley crew, but all the more interesting for it.
If you've decided to do it the old-fashioned way — toss back a couple of sambucas, polish it all off with a mojito, add some "red hawthorn tincture" on top of that, and then drink vodka long and tediously with a random companion at the bar — forget it. Firstly, Europeans stopped being surprised by the breadth of the Russian soul back in the last century. And secondly, getting drunk at a bar is something only a very rich person, or one who was already heavily drunk beforehand, can afford.
"The price of drinks at the bar is the same everywhere — it's equally high not only for the average Russian but for the European too. I don't count a difference of 2-3 euros either way, because if a little 0.33 bottle of Sprite costs 10-13 euros, then it no longer matters. Nevertheless, there is a correlation with the club's entry price. At Pacha, for example, entry is dearer, and the drinks are correspondingly dearer than, say, at Eden.".
So what to do? The inquisitive English mind isn't too original:
"On Ibiza, especially in San Antonio, it's mainly the English who holiday. They like to get properly hammered, no worse than the Russians; though in all that time I never came across outright louts. Since everything in the clubs is expensive, it's a completely familiar sight for a group to drive up to a club with a portable cooler, pull out the alcohol — and get sozzled as sausages. One group of girls was having such a merry time that they were already starting up in the car park at 2 a.m. when we arrived, and at 6 a.m., as we were leaving, we found them still there: they no longer had anywhere to go. Officially it's forbidden, and at many clubs the parking attendants chase them off, but all the same — outside every club there are always little groups clustering with bottles.".
20 September, Renaissance Closing Party
For now the organisers are keeping the line-up secret, but you can say with confidence that there'll be no superfluous, boring or uninteresting DJs. It's not that kind of brand.
25 September, Defected Closing Party
The Defected label foresees no problems whatsoever, as long as there are energetic girls in the world with a leaning towards romance who love to dance to the simple melodies of soulful house. Junior Jack and Kid Crème, they say, outperformed everyone at the recent Sensation White, while the dazzling pretty-boy Martin Solveig has long been deeply loved even by elderly housewives. English housewives, naturally — ours prefer Lev Leshchenko.
28 September, Pure Pacha Closing Party
Everything's clear here — two heroes and two friends, Pete Tong and Sander Kleinenberg, will blow the club to hell and back. Ibiza without Pete Tong is like sex without an orgasm — the process seems pleasant enough, but something's just not right.
Europe's holidaying youth is generally not inclined to reflection (the "emo" movement doesn't count), and the word "complex" is entirely absent from their vocabulary. Don't be surprised if complete strangers start striking up acquaintance with you in the street — all friendly and positive (less so in the morning, more so in the evening). KaZantip tries to be something similar, but for now (already) it's not going well.
"At Amnesia, at the famous "Espooma" — a foam party known the world over — the foam is released at 6 a.m. to the old classic hits of the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, Queen and so on, and meanwhile the crowd roars, whistles, dances, hugs and kisses people who were complete strangers until then, who here and now become your brothers in happiness.".
20 September, Cream Closing party: Vonyc.com present
The legendary club project Cream has secured the backing of Internet radio and closes its Ibiza season spectacularly, drawing on the forces of the planet's very top DJs — the euro-trance chief Paul van Dyk and the musically somewhat heavier Ferry Corsten. And on the terrace their material will be presented by the acknowledged masters of pop music with the "electro" prefix, Sebastian Ingrosso and the Axwell project.
21 September, Manumission Closing Party
Closing the Manumission series will be Tom Middleton — the man without whom there would have been no cult Aphex Twin record "Analogue Bubblebath EP", though he became famous for his numerous remixes — from Fluke and Leftfield to Lamb and Jamiroquai.
24 September, Cocoon Closing Party
The Cocoon label and its main star Sven Väth are, perhaps, the most conspicuous and brilliant lights in the Ibiza firmament. Sven Väth would gladly stay here forever, but the very fact that the rest of the world exists can't help but attract the attention of such a curious man. So he criss-crosses the globe all year in order to spend the summer on his beloved island. At the season closing, on the main dancefloor Sven will be helped by his old friend Richie Hawtin, while on the terrace Ricardo Villalobos and Luciano will breathe life into the dry clatter of minimal.
Ibiza is no vanity fair, but even here there are divisions into rich and poor.
"Still, the most respectable crowd is at Pacha. On Ibiza it's no miracle to see 45-60-year-olds, quite mature men and women, dancing on the floor. For the wealthy crowd there are usually separate VIP zones, but even if you estimate the average age of the visitors, then for Pacha it's roughly around 30-35 for men and 25-30 for the girls. I can't recall anyone under 20 in all my time there. Next, probably, comes Space, Amnesia along with Privilege, and then Eden, Es Paradis, Heaven and so on. There's probably a certain price threshold at work. You can get into many clubs for free, since by day at Salinas, at Bora-Bora and other gathering spots the crowds swarm with promoters handing out discount flyers or free passes. So while you can get into Eden, Es Paradis or Privilege for free almost any day, and less often into Amnesia or Space, at Pacha there are no freebies in principle.".
11 September, Carl Cox Closing Party
The name makes it clear whose party this is, who's in charge and who's the daddy in the house. Carl Cox, who turned out splendidly in the role of the "utterly schizoid junkie thug" Pablo Hasan, has been in the club business so long that he still remembers mixing records on gramophones. Helping him close his personal Ibiza season will be another old dinosaur, Laurent Garnier. Which means it'll be techno, techno, techno.
27 September, Xtravaganza / SpinClub Closing Party
The Xtravaganza label has long held a residency at the club Space — here they love the understated trance performed by the label's head boss Alex Gold. Alex released his first official mix back in 1993, on cassette. Back then he played funky house with no particular hint of any potential for meditation, but over the past 15 years he's developed a taste for trance — and can no longer give it up. On the terrace, Chris Liebing, the German master of "rattles" and "clatterers", will add a bit of his own harshness to the common pot.
30 September, We Love Space (a.m. + p.m.) Closing Party
At this celebration, which starts at 8 a.m. and goes on for a full day, what has come together is, perhaps, the strongest DJ line-up of all those on offer. Here you have 2 Many DJs, and David Guetta, and DJ Hell, as well as Andy Cato, Paul Woolford, David Careta, Tom Novy... If you go on any further, tears start to sting your eyes, because ordinary music-lover's happiness is entirely attainable, and it will be found at the party in honour of Space's season closing.
Incidentally, tickets to the clubs are just as far from cheap as the drinks at the bar. For a night of music you'll have to shell out between 30 and 60 euros — cheaper, of course, than a similar night with a prostitute, but pricier than any party in Russia (except the Forts). And the freebies, it turns out, don't last forever...
"All the freebies in the clubs are valid, as a rule, until 2 a.m. It varies everywhere, of course. At Space, for example, you could get in free for Carl Cox only until 10 p.m., somewhere else it was the opposite, until 3, but on average it's around 2 a.m. — the time when the clubs start filling up to bursting. The main programme starts at 3, so managing to catch the most interesting part in even two clubs at once is practically impossible, all the more so for free. That is, once you've come into a club, you stay there. If you got in free at 1 a.m., you'll go to the bar for a refuel anyway, and if you bought a ticket, you get one drink free. You can't leave the clubs. At Amnesia, for instance, you can only go out and come back after 5 a.m., by which time the club's bars have already paid for themselves three times over. So whether you like it or not, you'll definitely have to pay for something, and that's only right.".
16 September, Slutfunk Closing Party
The series with the excellent name wraps up with a set by that same Villalobos, but this time in the company of the Canadian genius Akufen. Judging by the list of guests who played this series' earlier parties (Matthias Tanzmann, Martin Landsky, Patrick Chardronnet), there'll be beautiful danceable music without too much "showing off".
19 September, Meganite Closing Party
Mauro Picotto and John Acquaviva will make this party unforgettable, regardless of the crowd's wishes, the weather or the mood. When specialists of this calibre take charge, nothing depends any longer on either chance or fate. They know what they're doing, and they do it well. It would all be fine, except that their music is a touch tiresome.
27 September, Monza Closing Party
The already familiar, ubiquitous Ricardo Villalobos and the tender Luciano will delight Privilege's visitors too. Sometimes it starts to seem that there's too much of them, but that's the price of popularity.
The main thing is to try to behave decently, which is very hard to do amid such free morals and so much bared flesh all around. Though who cares? No one's watching you anyway, and that frees your hands. You can even go about in shorts and slippers. Beautiful!
"Face control I, frankly, didn't notice at all. The cost of a package to Ibiza, or even of a club ticket, is in itself no weak form of face control. I'd come into a club in shorts and slippers and no one said a word to me. In heat like that everyone goes about that way, yet I never met any outright thugs or slobs there. So when Moscow and St Petersburg promoters proclaim strict face control in order to create some sort of Ibiza atmosphere, they are, to put it mildly, being disingenuous, or else they've simply never been there themselves.".
That's one way to close the season on Ibiza. Or it can be done differently — however it works out. Once you're on Ibiza, you somehow don't ask yourself "what for?" or "why?". Pure pleasure from the best dance music in the world, in the greatest concentration and of the highest quality.
P.S. "Well, and finally... We arrived at the Renaissance label's party at the club Pacha just in time for Cattaneo's set. Armand Van Helden played another 4-5 tracks and then Hernan took over the decks. About halfway through his set, DJ Sasha turned up in the DJ booth (and by that point Markus James and several other label managers were already hanging around there), even though he wasn't playing anywhere and wasn't billed, either that day or a week before or after. He'd simply come to give him a hug, pay his respects, and then, already "tipsy" as they say, went out onto the dancefloor with three girls and danced right next to us until morning. Something like that can only happen on Ibiza.".